There comes a point in many of our lives when the path we’ve worked so hard to stay committed to begins to feel a little too tight. Maybe nothing is “wrong” on the surface, but something in you knows you’ve outgrown the version of yourself who made that choice.

In a recent conversation on my podcast, Vanessa Correa named something that captured this moment perfectly. She said, “Don’t hold onto a mistake just because you’ve spent a long time making it.”

That line caught me because it speaks to a truth so many of us live quietly. We stay committed to a degree, a job, a relationship, a leadership identity, because we fear what changing course might signal. Not to ourselves, but to everyone watching.

Yet one of the bravest forms of self-respect is the willingness to unchoose a path that no longer reflects the person you are becoming.

Unchoosing is not giving up.
Unchoosing is choosing again.

Fear Is Often the Real Barrier

Vanessa also spoke about how often fear, not circumstance, is what keeps people stuck. I see this in my coaching work too. It’s rarely that people lack options. It’s that the familiar feels safer, even when it’s no longer fulfilling.

When you’ve spent years investing in something, it can feel almost irresponsible to imagine walking away. But staying out of fear is not loyalty. It’s survival mode dressed up as commitment.

You still have agency, even when life moves quickly.
You still get to pivot before life forces you to.

A question for you: Where in your life are you holding on simply because you’ve held on for so long? If you feel something awakening as you sit with that, the full conversation goes even deeper. I’d love for you to listen.

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/1572xpRFFn0O2TlLieyEdJ?si=77NVnGqzQgm-llCSki95lQ

YouTube: https://youtu.be/pF-2kPpAHAM